Wendy Maltz

Honestly this wasn't as interesting as I expected. It's meant to be a study of women's sexual fantasies, but while it is even-handed and reasonably inclusive nothing was very surprising or revolutionary. The books is clearly derived from Maltz experience in sex therapy and seems more oriented at providing the sort of information and advice that is most likely provided at her workshops. It doesn't really have the meat you would expect of a serious academic work.

It is nice to be able to read a broad cross section of real women's fantasies to get an idea of the sort of diversity in fantasy, but in all honesty I found most of the fantasies boring and stereotypical. Thankfully Maltz did mange to include a few that I did find notable, either for their humor, creativity, sexiness or shock value. On the whole it was a decent sex positive book and I don't think I wasted my time, I was just hoping for something with more meat to it.… (altro)

This is the first book I received from the Harper Collins First Look program, and what a way to start. I have a dear friend who is a self-professed porn addict, struggling for many years to completely eliminate his porn use.

This book doesn't judge or preach. It's not a morality issue. They delve into the beginnings of the addiction, how our childhood exposure largely determines our relationship with porn later, and how it escalates.

The two biggest things I took away were:

1) This addiction has a STRONG neurobiology component. Because of the process our bodies go through, a porn addiction is a PHYSICAL addiction. Just like drugs or alcohol, there is a legitimate, medical, physical withdrawl that must be expected, planned for, and managed. It will require complete abstinence, as the neuropathways are there for life.

2) This addiction will ALWAYS ESCALATE, no matter how benign or how cancerous it seems at the moment. There is no plateau. There is no standing still. You are either actively recovering, or you are sinking, and there is no bottom until the consequences create one. The authors pull no punches in detailing the accounts of porn addicts and the journey of their disease.

There are not only relational, but serious physical repercussions to porn addiction, ad they cannot be avoided. One of the most telling comments I remember is a recovering addict who said,"Porn has created a huge gap between the kind of woman I enjoy being it ad he kind of woman I actually desire sexually."

Those fighting a porn addiction, or even those just suspecting that they may have a problem, will find this book valuable. The entire last half is devoted to recovery, deciding if you are indeed ready to recover, discovering the motivation and the desire needed to recover, doable action steps and even help dealing with relapse.

The book is also an indispensable resource for anyone who cares about a porn addict, and the numbers are staggering. I not only helps you understand the why and the how, but gives even the partner clear guidelines for what not to do and how to truly help and support someone in recovery.

The authors aver that pornography and porn addiction has become not only a personal and relation issue, but with the easy availability the Net has brought, it as become a societal issue. All of us will be affected by porn addiction in one way or another, in the course of our lives. All of us should educate ourselves and prepare to help and support those around us looking to win the war… (altro)

I highly recommend this book as a primary resource for anyone struggling with a pornography addiction or involved with someone who has a pornography addiction. The authors take a pragmatic look at the consequences of porn addiction and offer tested and real-life steps to move away from addiction and towards healthy sexuality. In doing so, they offer hope to many who feel overwhelmed and indeed "trapped" in their addictive behaviors or in their relationship with someone who is addicted. Very good and an extensive resources section in the back.… (altro)