Annette Baran

First line:
~ Today there are sixteen ways to conceive a baby ~

Lethal Secrets. This is another book I re-read, having read it the first time in about 1993 or so.

I found it just as compelling now as I did then. A small study but with valid conclusions, that have held up over the past 20 years.

I first read this after reading The Dance of Deception and between the two books and help from the fertility clinic that carried out our DI and the psychiatrist we were seeing for family counseling, made a decision to disclose their biological origins, to my two sons. Although this book makes an argument for disclosure at an older age, the boys were about 13 and 9 and they both took it well, although with different levels of understanding.

I gained a lot of understanding about the damage to relationships that is incurred when such secrets are kept.

I would recommend this book to anyone who is involved with children conceived in this way; parents, donors, children, family members, clinic staff.

Secrecy was almost commanded by our doctors and we did not question it. I believe now that children should know right from the beginning that there is something special about their birth and that families are configured in many different ways. Families would be far healthier in the long run.… (altro)