Amanda RipleyRecensioni

Best for:
Anyone interested in narratives around people making connections across seemingly large divides.

In a nutshell:
Journalist Ripley explores the concept of ‘high conflict’ through the stories of a few different individuals and groups.

Worth quoting:
“The challenge of our time is to mobilize great masses of people to make change without dehumanizing one another.”

“Hatred assumes the enemy is immutable. If the enemy will always be evil, there is no reason to ever consider any creative solutions to the conflict.”

Why I chose it:
Way back in autumn of last year, when I bought this book, I was trying to figure out better ways to deal with interpersonal conflict.

Review:
It took me a long while to get into this book. I started it back in December 2023, but only over the last couple of weeks have I really gotten into it, probably reading about 2/3 of it in that time. That doesn’t mean it’s a bad book, but I had to meet it where it is, because I don’t think it’s quite what I was looking for. I thought it would be a bit more prescriptive about managing and working through conflict. And while there are tips, and a couple of appendices, it’s more like a series of long-form essays exploring different types of conflicts. And looking at it that way, it’s a decent book, though I do disagree with some point, or at least some of the characterizations the author makes.

Ripley talks about Gary, who lives in a tiny, well-off community in the San Francisco Bay Area, and how his attempts to make change in the volunteer board governing the town deepened conflict within. She interviews Curtis, a former gang member who has managed to leave that life. She talks to Sandra, a former member of FARC in Colombia who decided to reintegrate into society. And she looks at a synagogue in New York that participated in an exchange with corrections officer in Michigan in an attempt to learn more about each other.

The chapters that looked at Curtis’s life I found to be quite interesting, because they look at what it takes for someone to make individual changes, and the support that is needed. Both Curtis and Sandra were involved in serious conflicts - gang wars, and paramilitary battles. And both on some level had to make the individual choice to leave, but they were only able to stay out because of family, community, and financial (possibly governmental) support.

The section with Gary was mostly interesting because Gary found himself deeply mired in conflict but was himself a conflict mediator by trade. Irony! But also a good example of how one can be absolutely knowledgeable about how to help others, but not take their own advice, because they convince themselves that they are right.

I think the struggle I have with this book is that I still am not quite sure how to apply this when the stakes are super high AND many people are involved AND there are potentially ‘right’ answers. And it’s interesting to read this book that was published a few years ago, because the conflict in Israel and Palestine features. Obviously the past seven months have brought this into stark view for many more people that before, and it can be deeply challenging to have conversations about this when the stakes are so high. From my perspective, I just have such a hard time wrapping my head around anyone who doesn’t see what Israel is doing to the Palestinian people as deeply immoral. And there are people who feel even more strongly about that than I do, as evidenced by encampments at universities and direct action against weapons manufacturers. But where is the solution if people are not willing to have the conversations that Ripley recommends? Like, it seems odd for people to have to plead their humanity? And I am sure there are people who feel basically completely opposite to me who cannot wrap their head around my perspective. But neither of us are decisions makers - and they aren’t talking to each other.

I can see it working for lower stakes issues, like choosing a provider for a contractor, or even things that have a wider impact, like tax rates. But for the really ‘high conflict’ issues, if the decision makers, or the people who can make the changes, are not willing to have conversations with people who have different views, what options are left?

Basically, even though Ripley uses some very large geopolitical examples in the book, I see her arguments making much more sense and being more effecting at the micro level. And generally speaking, that probably will work for me in most instances. But at the macro level? How can it work if folks won't try it?

What’s next for this book:
I’ll probably hold onto it as it has some appendices that might prove useful in the future.

“Education is a gift that once attained cannot be forsaken. It must be nurtured and fostered like a flower ready to bloom. Tests do not prove intelligent capabilities. Aptitude and grit do as well as perservereance, independence, a strong will, and loving support of your chosen family and friends.”

Very interesting book looking at who survives disasters/extreme situations and why they survive. Not a dry read at all, bits of humour and a very human viewpoint. Oh, and I really hope I have a decent sized hippocampus. It seems like it might be important.

Fantastic writer. I like all of Amanda's works. This book influenced me while I was writing my own book. If you have an interest in how people respond during disasters, and what drives their behaviors and motivation, this book is worth a read.

More evidence of how America's schools are dooming the future generations. Surprising that Finland is a top country for education and they transformed themselves in ~10 years.

i wasn't really ready to hear what this book was saying at the beginning. i mean, i thought it was interesting and well thought out but not for me personally. by the end she had me.

this book is so very important and i know i will be rereading again and again until this is ingrained in me.

An easy-reading but informative book. The author travels the world to understand why some countries are better than others when it comes to educating their children. Until our leaders decide they want our children to become effective critical thinkers, active learners, and successful adults, the parents must ensure their children understand the importance of hard work, accomplishing goals, and becoming effective communicators. Parents must become involved in local politics and school board issues to develop into advocates for their children.

Normal conflict is healthy and helps us solve problems. But high conflict, the kind that makes us outraged and determined to destroy the idiots who disagree, serves only to perpetuate itself. It seduces us, draws other people in, escalates, and spreads like wildfire.

The author identifies "accelerants" of high conflict such as:
- Binary thinking (it's us versus them)
- Our tendency to label and categorize others
- "Firestarters" who have a vested interest in sustaining the conflict
- Negative emotions such as humiliation and anger, which have an addictive hold on us
- The "conflict industrial complex" that includes news media, social media, and USA's winner-take-all electoral system

Here are ways to tame high conflict:
- Active listening
- Separating oneself from firestarters
- Embracing complication and nuance
- Seeking the root cause of a conflict

Ironically, the best way to win people over may be listening to them without trying to win them over.

To explore these concepts, the author interviews some interesting people such as an environmentalist who railed against genetically modified organisms even after learning that they could have some environmental benefits, a lawyer who was a legendary peacemaker but became a vicious attack dog when he entered local politics, and a former member of a Chicago street gang who is now a peace activist and "violence interrupter."

She also studies an attempt to actively apply these concepts to bring two sides of an issue together. A group of conservative Michiganders and a group of liberal New York Jews held summits in each other's cities to discuss gun control. They struggled to put side their judgment and anxieties, but ended up feeling emotionally closer and less judgmental afterward. Later, when the 2018 Pittsburgh synagogue shooting took the lives of 11 Jews, the Michiganders flew to New York and gave a speech of solidarity in front of their counterparts' congregation.

Something bothers me about that scenario. Even after all that, the minds of the Michiganders weren't changed; they were still against the regulation of assault rifles. I'd like to ask the liberals: what is the benefit of having a kumbaya moment with conservatives when they still support the policies that lead to your annihilation? But maybe I'm still stuck in the high-conflict mindset just by posing that question.

I'm trying to integrate the lessons of this book with the lessons of stoicism I gained from Marcus Aurelius's Meditations. Our lives are short and insignificant in the totality of human history. We will die and be forgotten. So while we are alive, why should we think that we must solve all the world's problems? Why carry all that burden and misery on our own shoulders? Instead, maybe we should humbly strive to improve things on a small scale, listening to our rivals with curiosity and helping the few we can.

Discover how human beings react to danger and what makes the difference between life and death.

I know many teachers aren't fans of Amanda Ripley's education reporting, but I think that's because she challenges so many elements of education we've come to accept as "normal" and reminds us that they aren't, in fact, normal--not in a global market, and not in a country where manufacturing means something very different now than it did at the time of Henry Ford. Even if you don't agree with Ripley's politics or her take on U.S. education, this is worth a read to see what education looks like in different countries.

Absolutely stunning. If you are living through these times, this book will explain what’s going on, how we got here and how, perhaps, we can get back.

Read it if you care about education. Ripley is an investigative journalist and an excellent writer; she draws you into the whirlpool of how to improve education through analysis of test scores that compare student performance on an international level and the experiences of three American teens abroad. As a teacher for more than 30 years, I must say I am a bit surprised that anyone would take offense at Ripley's information that teachers in the highest scoring countries are from systems with FAR more competitive and challenging teacher training programs. It is crucial to the quality of education. Compared to this, her comments about pay are insignificant (and frankly minimal). Of course, you cannot be a great teacher if smart is the only thing you bring to the table (sense of humor, liking children help) but it is the place you must begin. Her comments about parents and school are right on. Sit down and talk to your kids. Meaningfully. I suspect much of the discontent about the book is because Ripley's makes no bones about the disproportionate role of sports in US schools. She is right.

adult nonfiction. Super interesting, but also kind of long. I never actually finished this audiobook but would recommend.

Good but I had to return to the library before I was done.

When the boat begins to sink or the floor begins to shake, does anything beyond random luck decide who lives and who doesn’t? Ripley tells the human story and the data story to engage the reader and help them be ready. Genetics and pre-conditioning certainly play a role, but there are also personal planning and formal training steps we can all take to be more prepared. The positive outcomes including improving our odds as well as making us less stressed before and especially after the moment of truth.

Rich with anecdotes, supported by empirical evidence, this book offers a refreshingly pragmatic viewpoint on education reform. It's not groundbreaking, but is the best attempt I've seen at linking big policy ideas to the lived experience of students.

The three nations featured in this book -- South Korea, Finland and Poland -- today all have world-class public education systems, but share little in common economically and demographically. The link is that all three decided, in various ways, to both elevate the status of teachers and make parents and students take education much more seriously. While the book stops short of giving specific policy recommendations for the U.S., it points toward (surprise!) the need for compromise between warring camps today. A must-read for anyone interested in public education.

In 'The Unthinkable", journalist Amanda Ripley investigates a variety of disasters to determine how people react in a crisis, and ultimately tries to determine who survives and why. Ripley makes use of academic research and news articles, as well as interviews with survivors and scientists.

While the stories and studies were interesting, I found that the author didn't make her arguments very well - she doesn't connect her chapters and she doesn't tell us why people with the specific traits identified in the book survive (the points are scattered throughout the book). The material covered was also somewhat superficial. The book however does provide some interesting material on how better to be mentally prepared for a disaster, most of which is common sense, but there are still useful nuggets of information in the book.

This book is easy to read, informative and educational, but I wish it included more indepth material.

A deep dive into education in America vs. the rest of the world. The author highlights the relaxed, but successful style of teaching in Finland and the intense and exhausting style in South Korea. She interviewed American foreign exchange students in both countries and compared their experiences. She highlighted the emphasis on sports over education in the US compared with other places. Interesting and also concerning.½

Really thorough, easy, non-graphic read about the psychology behind survival. There's some great tips in here for how to adjust your own thinking, and how to practice for the times that it really matters. I found her discussion of risk assessment to be spot-on, and wholly relevant. I'd absolutely recommend this to anyone.

This was definitely an interesting read. The author interviewed numerous survivors of various disasters (school shootings, fires, plane crashes, boats sinking, the WTC bombing and 9/11, etc) in an effort to determine how people react to tragedies and how those reactions can help people survive.

The author states that each of us cycle through a survival arc: first is denial ("this can't be happening!") to deliberation ("I don't know what to do; what should I do?") to the decisive moment ("I am doing this."). Along the way, people do things that are puzzling (survivors often try to gather things to take with them, even when they should be fleeing for their lives) to troubling (punching people, taking someone's life jacket from them, etc) to difficult to understand (freezing in place even though you know you should be moving), and the author tries to explain these as maladaptive uses of evolutionary behaviour (freezing, for example, can help you against certain predators, but doesn't help you when you're in a burning building).

Altogether, I found this book to be an extremely interesting look at human behaviour in tragedies. Overwhelmingly, people seem to be polite and courteous, even if it puts them in danger. There isn't a lot when it comes to practical advice on survival (the author argues that much of our survival instinct is at least partially hardwired), but the author does recommend preparing for disasters you are likely to encounter in your area and drilling yourself frequently on what you would do in such a situation. People who had a plan in place seemed to fare much better than those who did not.

Ripley travels to three countries - Poland, South Korea, and Finland - all of which have high school students testing higher than any other countries' students in the world. She also talked to three U.S. students who traveled to these three countries as part of exchange programs. Her findings, and their implications for how we could improve our own education system, are interesting and pretty important, I think. Definitely a recommended read to all who work in education or have children in U.S. schools.

An extremely interesting read that delves into the human psyche. If you have ever wondered how you may react in a life or death situation, this book covers your possible responses. It gives an in depth study into scenarios with true to life accounts from people who have survived situations that seemed impossible detailing their responses and emotions as situations unfolded. Well researched and put together, this book is easy to read and informative.

We are all just a little morbidly fascinated by horrific events and this book reveals perhaps the psychological workings of that and why we do what we do as a species under stress from an evolutionary and biological perspective. A wonderful read, hard to put down.

Quick read. Good breadth of stories for the topic. Somewhat rational approach. However, Amanda jumps around and it's tough to tell right away which stores are anecdotal and which she will elaborate upon.

This book is *fascinating*. Exploring how and why we do what we do when disaster strikes, from terrorist bombings to hurricanes to car crashes, The Unthinkable was so interesting! We worry about unlikely worst case scenarios (plane crashes) while failing to prepare for the everyday possibilities that cause harm far more often (house fires, heart disease). The author talks about how what we do in an emergency is often illogical and unhelpful and how to be prepared for the unexpected. There are definitely some practical tips and experiences to learn from here, but reading about our "disaster personality" is just as compelling.

Like a Mystery to be Solved...
Ms. Ripley leads us through her quest to answer the puzzle of why our American students are not doing well when compared with students in many other countries. I know, most Americans could care less about this. It's an American bias that we are always the best, but in a number of areas we have been slipping behind. Further, if our schools are not performing at a high level - this trend will continue.
She's taken an ingenious approach to finding an answer.
First, she does her homework to find an international exam that tests not the retention of facts, but a test of "critical thinking," or how do students solve real problems that can confront us in life and on the job. (She provides a link to take some test questions yourself.)
Secondly, she goes directly to the source - the students themselves. She enlists the aid of 3 American students who are in year-long exchange programs in nations that regularly post high scores.
Third, she honestly addresses criticisms of the exam and the teaching methods utilized in those other nations.
In short, she demonstrates some genuine Critical Thinking herself. If you're interested in "why" and also want some suggestions for improvement - this is a terrific book.
I wish it was required reading for every school board member in America.

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