David Brooks (1)Recensioni

David Brooks doesn't profess to always follow the road to character, but he wanted to know what it looked like. Thus, his motivation for studying people throughout history who made an effort to build their character and follow a moral code of conduct that wouldn't change based on circumstance, their desires, or the fashion of the day.

The book starts with an eloquent introduction. Brooks outlines his thesis that humans have an internal struggle between "Adam 1" (the purest, moral self) and "Adam 2"(a more hedonistic, selfish self/ as long as you're not doing anything obviously bad, you're doing just fine). He also describes a current culture that has made it harder to be "good". Listening to the audio version of this book I found myself furiously scribbling notes, wanting to capture everything in the introduction as it seemed so relevant.

Each of the people Brooks highlights in his book as examples of taking the road to character are flawed, as we all are (at one point while listening my husband turned to me and said "Is this a book about people with good character or bad character?!") This is where the book really loses momentum. Instead of being inspired by their stories, I really found the book to just drag through most of these profiles. They really could have benefited from some significant editing.

The final chapter of the book provides a nice closing, weaving together the themes from the profiles. Along with the introduction, this is where Brooks shines.

Weekend home sick = finally finished this book!! Well worth a couple years reading slowly.

If you think you know how you think, think again. David Brooks explains, using a fictitious couple, how most of our thinking is done on the subconscious level, and we don't even know it. He's not making it up. His descriptions of how our minds work is based on bona fide findings of many scientists, most notably Daniel Kahneman (and Amos Tversky) whose book Thinking, Fast and Slow I highly recommend as a more thorough discussion of the what goes on in our little brains.

I read Bobos in Paradise years back when it first came out. This is better; or rather, it starts out similarly and a little detachedly, but improved as it went - especially as it got personal.

Brooks is a good writer and an astute observer. Everyone sees the world through their specific lens. Brooks sees the world through affluent, well-heeled eyes--this is what he knows, what he lives, and the social circles through which he travels. That's an observation, not a faulting. Sometimes it shows up in his writing - like when he makes a point about how a plumber has to be super-careful to be taken as credible among an educated, academic crowd. That's likely true from the POV of an educated, academic, coastal-dwelling, Ivy-leagueish type of crowd. But the plumber? If he's mixing with that crowd at all, he's not looking to impress them and he doesn't care what they think of him--he knows plenty about life and people that many elitists don't and never will.

This book is really a gentle way to tell elitists to get out of their ivory towers, burst the bubbles they live in, or step out from behind their screen and mix it up with real people. That there's joy in understanding and seeing a person - not an identify, not a stereotype, not a political party, but the complex, nuanced, and wonder-full person right in front of them. In my experience, many don't want to, some don't know how to, and Brooks points out what they're missing. Also, he offers advice on ways to do it.

The chapter where Brooks' writing got personal is when he tells about his childhood, lifelong friend who succumbed to suicide. That got real and vulnerable and was Brooks at his best.

Recommended primarily to those who denigrate people who think differently, hold fewer degrees, or work 'dirty' jobs, as somehow less than and/or those who've ever used the phrase "flyover country" unironically.½

Summary: An exploration of how we might see people deeply and help them know that they are seen.

Most of us would want to be known as people who help people feel seen and to be deeply seen ourselves. But in our most honest moments, we have to admit we are not very good at this. We don’t listen well. We are far more capable of trying to impress others with our stories, our wit, our accomplishments. One of the most winsome aspects of this book is David Brooks candid admission that this characterizes his relationships far too often, even during his journey to explore this subject.

With his trademark clarity mixing research and personal narrative, Brooks describes the nature of good relationships, where people are seen by each other. He organizes this inquiry into three parts. The first of these is “I See You.” He speaks of how important and how lacking this is. He writes about the ways we often size up and diminish others. By contrast, he describes the qualities of an Illuminator, a model he will hold up and develop throughout the book: tender, receptive, actively curious, affectionate, generous, and holistic, seeing the whole person. Such people also are skilled in the practice of accompaniment, a relaxed awareness of the other as we share life with them. He discusses the marks of good conversations, where we loop back, actively listening, and avoid being the “topper.” He distinguishes between unhelpful questions where we stay superficial and the questions that take us deeper, that invite people to share something more of themselves.

The second part of the book goes deeper in seeing others in their struggles. One of the most powerful chapters in this section concerns how you serve someone in despair, and Brooks narrates his efforts to do this with a friend who eventually ended his life. He writes about what it means to empathize, describing it as mirroring, mentalizing, and caring. He speaks of how Illuminators are both aware of how they’ve been shaped by suffering and allow others who are suffering to process this question.

The final part of the book explores what it means to see people in their strengths. He summarizes personality with “the Big Five” ((he’s not much of a Myers-Briggs fan): extroversion, conscientiousness, neuroticism, agreeableness, and openness. He has a chapter on life tasks, reminding us that people are in a lifelong process of growth and that knowing someone involves discerning where in that process they are. He explores how we listen to and understand life stories and watch for how ancestors show up. He concludes with asking about the nature of wisdom and how it is acquired over a life, and how that changes our relationships.

In a time where we are so divided, where depression and anxiety are skyrocketing and our Surgeon General has named loneliness as a public health crisis, David Brooks has written a book that represents both a way to address many of these concerns and that appeals to “the better angels of our nature.” He writes as a fellow-learner on the journey, not as an authority. He speaks to one of the basics of life that often is overshadowed by the glitzy and the glamourous. He reminds us of the qualities of a good friend. He encourages me to want to be one.

David Brooks is a far better writer than I knew. The book is a collection of well-written short biographies of a number of people (such as Dwight Eisenhower, George Marshall, Frances Perkins, George Elliot, etc) describing the trials and tribulations they endured that allowed them to build character and achieve deserved prominence. A final chapter summarizes the biographies and describes some of the commonality of the experience of the subjects.

Brooks is an excellent popularizer of social psych and social wisdom. Not a lit review, but a survey of the ways we can know others and the ways we avoid knowing and being known. Richly elaborated with examples from friends, from his reading, and from his own life. A very thoughtful book that is offered as an antidote for our alienated and polarized age.

The first two-thirds were a bit dull. Read like a smart person's "How to Win Friends" book, but with updated data, anecdotes, and references. However, I found the last third incredibly valuable and useful in his discussion of personality types. After dismissing Meyers-Briggs as fun but frivolous, he launches into a powerful explanation of how important it is that the world is made up of various personality types. But he also makes a beautiful and empathetic case for valuing each type of personality fully--with all its strengths and flaws. It's a clear and attainable approach to practicing real empathy. It's an idea that I'll be chewing on for quite some time. I highly recommend this book!

Now, in The Road to Character, he focuses on the deeper values that should inform our lives. Responding to what he calls the culture of the Big Me, which emphasizes external success, Brooks challenges us, and himself, to rebalance the scales between our “résumé virtues”—achieving wealth, fame, and status—and our “eulogy virtues,” those that exist at the core of our being: kindness, bravery, honesty, or faithfulness, focusing on what kind of relationships we have formed.

Looking to some of the world’s greatest thinkers and inspiring leaders, Brooks explores how, through internal struggle and a sense of their own limitations, they have built a strong inner character.

I will admit that some chapters rang truer than others in regards to the biographical examples. I really didn't connect with Eisenhower and a couple others. Some started strong and then became weaker. Some went the other direction of weak to strong. I think this is a reflection of my own preference. My preference were those sections regarding Montaigne, Saint Augustine, Frances Perkins, Eisenhower's mother, George Eliot, George C. Marshall, and A. Philip Randolph. Eisenhower and Bayard Rustin didn't make any positive impression on me.

The final chapter did a good wrap. I will be thinking on Mr. Brooks' argument for distinction between Adam I and Adam II for some time. I couldn't help but reflect on Ecclesiastes as I read this book. Many of his arguments and point can be summed up in that one book of the Bible... one of my favorites.

I chose this book because I admire David Brooks more than just about any other political writer/commentator of our time. And that might be a bit unusual since he is considered a “conservative pundit.” At least he used to be considered that. I am probably on the opposite side of that political continuum. These days most people see Brooks as a middle of the road commentator more than a partisan one. That’s because he is so wise. This book ostensibly attempts to teach its reader to learn to be better at getting to know our fellow man and woman in ways most of us never really thought about. It is very prescriptive with a plethora of anecdotes and references. The notes section is excellent with easy hyper links back to the text they refer to in the book. All of that said, as a 73-year-old retiree, I almost wish Brooks had made this a 20-minute TED talk rather than a full blown book. Perhaps if I were still working and were 30 years younger, I would feel differently. I guess maybe I see myself as being beyond hope of long term improvement of my people skills. I could see Brooks’ book being used in social science class at the college level, and maybe it is. I think in that context it would be valuable. Anytime I see David Brooks’ name as a guest anywhere, I sit up and pay attention. That is just how important what he has to say is. David Brooks is something of a national treasure.

A lot of the stuff in this book is stuff I already believe. For example, good relationships make life worth living, the early childhood years have a profound effect on later development, most people wildly overestimate the extent to which they are in control of their lives, the culture you grew up in plays a huge role in determining your values and character. These are not radical beliefs, but, as Mr. Brooks says, people love to hear other people confirming their beliefs. So I checked this out as an audiobook and listened to it. (And by the way, the narrator was great.)

Mr. Brooks cited like 200 studies over the course of the book, weaving the "science" in with the story of a fictional couple who embody some of the principles. I put "science" in quotes because science isn't really that good at figuring out people. I think Mr. Brooks would agree with me here. Still, he quotes study after study.

I don't think I'd recommend this unless you like to read the "Findings" section in Harper's, which I do.

Enhanced my understanding of Americans.

I enjoyed the first third of the book and the last chapter. The middle left me wondering why his discovery of religion has anything to do with overcoming tribalism and battling toxic individualism as that is the perfect breading ground for such things. He had good points on forming communities and helping each other, then contradicted himself in how religion is a crucial part of that, after saying religion isn't the same as personal belief - all in an effort to seem relatable? To me it came across as preachy and heavy-handed.

There is a lot of great content in the book, and a lot to be learned, but you will need to be patient while he works through some stuff.

Mr. Brooks has written a discussion of his approach to knowing about listening and talking to people. He has interest in the topic for many years both because of his own introversion and because of his career in journalism. The book is organized into general principles, communicating with people in various difficult and crisis situations, and a third part of assorted other ways to know people. The book is largely a self-help guide and contains a lot of advice that mostly seems good. At times I would agree with the author that it is wise.

What struck me negatively is what is negative in many self-help books; it is heavily referenced with ideas and quotes from famous psychologists and psychological studies. These ideas are often interesting, but many are non-scientific in that they cannot be tested, or, at least, have not been tested. So they amount to a number of ideas that Brooks has collected over the years because they please him or support his approach to things, but they often seem superficial or a small part of a much larger field of study. The studies I’m familiar with are not well-served this way, and their use reminded me of the Monty Python routine about the BBC show on how to play the flute. Blow in this end and move your fingers up and down on the stops.

There is discussion of personality types, but Freud is ignored (he is briefly mentioned as having been neurotic), perhaps because he dealt with psychopathology. Yet others with profoundly kooky ideas (e.g., Carl Jung) are quoted when needed. They are in the style of ... As a famous person once said, “Buy low and sell high”.

The author repeats the popular criticism of the Myers-Briggs personality classification as being scientifically unsound, but the alternative Five Factor Model is presented as a sound tested classification. These two systems have been shown to be highly correlated.

Finally, the author ends his book with a few pages of self-criticism, but he must realize that should he manage to become the Buddha, others would find him insufferable.

The most notable thing about this book is that it clearly is built from a series of articles strung together into a central hypothesis. There isn't terrific flow between the chapters -- the voice, style, and the goal of each chapter is highly variable and it really undermines the idea that the book is supposed to be an expose of a central social thesis.

That being said, the book is enjoyable -- there are many funny parts (although non quite as funny as Brooks seem to think) and many insightful parts. I particularly enjoyed the introduction about education, and the sections on vacations and spirituality. In contrast, the parts on business and academia were dull, repetitive and highly exaggerated.

While I do admire the amount of research David Brooks must have put into writing this book, I simply do not agree with his conclusion. And I rather disliked the condescending tone of the book. Thanks for the advice Dave, but no thanks. I've found my own road to character and it suits me just fine.

David Brooks’s The Second Mountain: The Quest for a Moral Life provided guidelines for readers seeking to pursue a better life. He wrote about two hypothetical mountains. The first is ego-centric that’s when an individual is bent on having a career. While at a university such a person focuses on a major, he hopes will fulfill his dreams. The goal is to get a good job, get promoted, and excel at his work. Soon, this employee rises to the top, and feels as though he has conquered the world by being independent.
At this level of accomplishment, he feels on top of the first mountain. Suddenly, he suffers a wakeup call. He realizes that there was a lack of meaning in this quest. This awareness might have resulted from a death in the family, a sudden illness, accident, depression, or a feeling of despondency. Now, he finds himself in a valley below. But while in despair he rethinks his motivations for success, and comes to the conclusion that he should pursue a different course in life.
This sudden fall and sometimes humiliation have spurred him on a new trajectory. He arises out of this painful doldrum to pursue new goals. He begins to think about interdependence and how he could be of service to others. This causes him to join an organization, embrace some group that he likes, and to live a completely different lifestyle. This is when he has transitioned to the second mountain of his life. This individual may be much older now, and as a result was able to discover his true calling in life.
Brooks also wrote about marriage, the mistakes he has made, divorce, and remarriage. He also discussed the ramifications of faith. His embracement of Judaism and Christianity that followed, and how he came to be shaped by both traditions. In the latter part of the book, he pointed out why community was necessary. Brooks dissected some social organizations to show why they became successful in serving their communities. He ended the book with a manifesto that was basically a recapitulation of his discussion in the text.

I discovered this book when I heard the author speak at an educator conference. Before the talk I was somewhat of a skeptic, but the ideas expressed were intriguing enough that I ordered the book. For me, it has been the right book at the right time in my personal journey. I have read some negative reviews on this book that criticize the author pointing to shortcomings in his personal life that sounded to me like snarky gossip attacking the messenger rather than the message. The very nature of these negative reviews revealed that they missed the message of this book. Character and virtue are qualities we never fully attain, we will always fall short. But if we keep striving to overcome our shortcomings and our misguided views as to what matters, we move closer to being a person of character. The goal is to continually seek to be better than we were before. Reading about influential figures from history who struggled with the same things I do, brings a certain comfort and renewed motivation.

Badly out of date

I enjoy reading Brooks. His ideas in this one, though, just don't stick with me after the book is done.

The book is all over the place, but each section was worth reading. The section on faith talking about Christianity vs Judaism reminded me of Harry Kemelman's Rabbi Small's discussions.

An interesting book that starts with a great premise but is its own undoing. The tagline "this is the happiest story you will ever read" is wrong and not really representative of what goes on. The story is strange and points in the plot are loosely connected in order to tee-up a boat load of research evidence. The style can get a little tedious quickly, but I still think the book is worth a good 4 stars. For a lot of the filler and stuff you will skim over, there are some real gems here too and parts which will make you smile or get your attention.

I found parts of it interesting and useful, but other parts repetitious and uninteresting. Worth a read, though.

I enjoy listening to David Brooks's commentary on PBS each Friday night. His common-sense, insightful views give me hope that we can all work together as a nation and as a global society. As I read The Second Mountain, I could hear his voice, at times thoughtful, at times humorous. I didn't agree with everything he wrote, but his honest approach to living a moral life was refreshing. He didn't pretend to have all the answers and acknowledged that his journey to find fulfillment continues as he looks for opportunities to serve the larger community. Too many books on morality and faith are preachy. This one reads as the quest that it is.

I'm not sure I would have titled it as he did, though, since the "second mountain" is really the first of five parts in the book and there wasn't much mention of it aside from the first section and a brief appearance again at the end. I think the subtitle, The Quest for a Moral Life, would have been a more accurate description.

There were also too many different lists/types of/stages/metaphors/rationales about this or that, which made the book feel fragmented. And the 15-page "Relationalist Manifesto" at the end (consisting of six additional, lengthy lists) was too much to take in. What core message did Mr. Brooks intend for his reader?

My favorite pages were examples of others doing good and the author's personal experiences, particularly with marriage. Drawing from numerous sources and a wide variety of lives, Mr. Brooks offers simple, practical, meaningful advice we can apply today as we discover a deeper sense of joy in committing to people and ideals and causes beyond our limited selves.

Likes the first half, especially as an overview of ideas. Skipped the marriage section, and skipped a lot of the last section. Moved more into talking about himself and fewer ideas.