I wasn't sure what I was expecting when I read this. I love weddings and have been in wedding withdrawal since my own wedding last year. I also frequent the nest/knot boards daily ( that's even how I found goodreads).

That being said, I'm not sure that I got much that I didn't already know about the wedding industry. Nothing was really shocking, eye-opening or interesting. If you are a knottie, than I say skip this. You'll get way more and better info hanging out on the message boards. For the uninitiated, you might enjoy this foray into another world much better. ( )

As someone who hates the fanfare and commercialism surrounding modern weddings, I found this book to be fascinating. ( )

Hilarious, illuminating account of the Wedding Industrial Complex. It's at its best when Mead quotes the endless businesspeople who see getting more money as a game they can win by milking people's emotions at what should be a spiritually significant time. All the ordinary motivations of capitalism are revealed in their full ickiness.

She's sometimes snarkier or less sympathetic than seems warranted. As funny as her voice is, sometimes I wanted less of it and more of her subjects' -- especially when they're ordinary people having a wedding rather than bigshot misogynist taste-makers. The book also suffers from its timing; same-sex marriage was legalized in MA during her research process and in the US 8 years after publication, so the idea that weddings don't always have a bride and a groom appears only as a somewhat awkward note in her epilogue that makes the whole thing feel a little dated.

But overall, if you are planning a wedding, or if you like behind-the-scenes investigations of an industry or subculture (I thought of [b:Word Freak: Heartbreak, Triumph, Genius, and Obsession in the World of Competitive Scrabble Players|8954|Word Freak Heartbreak, Triumph, Genius, and Obsession in the World of Competitive Scrabble Players|Stefan Fatsis|https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1442766196s/8954.jpg|3163711]), this will give you a lot to both laugh and think about. ( )

Last year, I took part in the wedding of one of my childhood-college friends, a person I have always considered to be level-headed, practical and generally a good person. That was before I found myself in a $500 dollar bridesmaid dess ($284 for the dress, $235 for the alterations), standing in 3-inch navy blue sandals ($55), listening to a minister drone on about the power of different kinds of love. That was also before I found myself giving her three separate parties: a bachelorette party, a lingerie party and a bridal shower ... all of which I was expected to provide gifts for, as well as pay for and plan (luckily many of the other guests chipped in on some of these activities). It was with all of this in mind that I picked up One Perfect Day: The Selling of the American Wedding, by Rebecca Mead, at Bookberries, a small independent bookstore on Lexington Avenue.

Mead sets out in her prologue that she is not writing a book about Bridezillas. Instead, she posits that it is the consumer-driven nature of weddings that drives and feeds the Bridezilla phenomenon, and it is this aspect of marriage that she choses to explore in her book. Each chapter deals with a different aspect of weddings, from bridal registries to choosing a dress, to choosing a minister, and discusses the way that these are symptomatic of particular aspects of American life in general.

My two favorite chapters in this book were the chapter on wedding dresses and the chapter on the selection of an officiant. In the wedding dress chapter, Mead begins with the purchase of wedding dresses and the rituals that surround this. She disucsses the idea that many women are looking for a dress the resonates with them - that will make them a princess in a poofy white dress starring in her big production - and the way that bridal stores give the illusion that each dress with come, one of a kind, specific for each woman. Then Mead goes to the factories in China where these "one-of-a-kind" dresses are made.

In the chapter about officiants, she talks about the idea that weddings are often no longer traditional religious ceremonies and couples look for ways to impart a sense of uniqueness on the ceremony. She watches a wedding officiated by a new-age minister. As part of the ceremony, the couple has an apache wedding prayer and a candle ceremony. She tries to track down the origination of these traditions and finds that the candle ceremony was instigated by greeting card companies and the so-called "apache" wedding prayer is from the movie "Broken Arrows". She also talks about the fact that anyone can become a wedding officiant by completing a course over the internet. Anyone can get a certificate (for a fee of five dollars) giving you the title of, "Cardinal, Lama, Guru, Friar, Reverend Mother, Swami, Magus, Dervish, High Preistess, Druid, Monk, Baron, Apostle of Humility, Martyr, Goddess, Angel and Saint (p138)."

Brides are encouraged to consume by all sorts of different industries. Mead cites a wedding survery that looked at the spending habits of engaged and single women. The survey found that engaged women spent more than single women on tanning sessions, diet paraphernalia, personal training, cosmetics, tooth whiteners, matching bedding sets, towels and a number of other things. The only things that single people routinely spent more money on were hair dye and pagers. Mead says, "The picture of the unattached life evoked by the survey is not a happy one: lonely nights passed between mismatched sheets, after evenings spent in the bathroom with a bottle of Miss Clairol, waiting for a beep on the pager (p118)."

It would take forever to discuss all of the funny, interesting insights in this book. Suffice to say, it was well worth the read even at hardcover prices. ( )

Mead is a smart narrator and a thorough researcher. Her witty voice makes what could be a dry subject entertaining and bubbly. Moreover, Mead refrains from critiquing weddings as a whole. What she is after is the thoughtless pursuit, by both the wedding industry and engaged couples, of the ideal wedding day. What, Mead asks, are we truly buying when we buy embossed napkins and sachets of rice and Godiva chocolate wedding cake favors? And, is there a better, a more productive way, to find what we are looking for? The answers are well-considered and, generally, compassionate. I do have to say that I found the epilogue, which addresses gay marriage (and to some degree the marketplace around those marriages) to be a contrived add-on that generalizes about same-sex couples and their level of commitment and that is a poorly-disguised attempt for Mead to insert politics into her text. But, that aside, the book is definitely a pleasure to read. ( )