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What We Don't Talk About When We Talk About Fat

di Aubrey Gordon

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3381077,845 (4.19)2
Biography & Autobiography. Sociology. Nonfiction. HTML:From the creator of Your Fat Friend and co-host of the Maintenance Phase podcast, an explosive indictment of the systemic and cultural bias facing plus-size people.
Anti-fatness is everywhere. In What We Don??t Talk About When We Talk About Fat, Aubrey Gordon unearths the cultural attitudes and social systems that have led to people being denied basic needs because they are fat and calls for social justice movements to be inclusive of plus-sized people??s experiences. Unlike the recent wave of memoirs and quasi self-help books that encourage readers to love and accept themselves, Gordon pushes the discussion further towards authentic fat activism, which includes ending legal weight discrimination, giving equal access to health care for large people, increased access to public spaces, and ending anti-fat violence. As she argues, ??I did not come to body positivity for self-esteem. I came to it for social justice.?
By sharing her experiences as well as those of others??from smaller fat to very fat people??she concludes that to be fat in our society is to be seen as an undeniable failure, unlovable, unforgivable, and morally condemnable. Fatness is an open invitation for others to express disgust, fear, and insidious concern. To be fat is to be denied humanity and empathy. Studies show that fat survivors of sexual assault are less likely to be believed and less likely than their thin counterparts to report various crimes; 27% of very fat women and 13% of very fat men attempt suicide; over 50% of doctors describe their fat patients as ??awkward, unattractive, ugly and noncompliant?; and in 48 states, it??s legal??even routine??to deny employment because of an applicant??s size.
Advancing fat justice and changing prejudicial structures and attitudes will require work from all people. What We Don??t Talk About When We Talk About Fat is a crucial tool to create a tectonic shift in the way we see, talk about, an
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Really thinking about how necessary this work is today.

We need intersectional fat activism NOW. Wonderful and necessary book. Anyone going into healthcare should be required to read this book. Also, anyone in media should absolutely read this book.

I was average size for 20 years and then I was fat for about 10 years. I am, again, average sized. I used to refer to my heavier days as "my fat decade". I guess I felt like it was important to reassure folks that I was no longer that person, that it was a decade not worth remembering. That my existence during this time was better left unaccounted for. It is so strange that I consider my larger-body years as like a mistake or a bad place when so many wonderful things happened during that time: I began a relationship with my husband, I was married, I moved to different parts of the country and my fur babies came into my life. It's weird how nothing is really good unless you're skinny. Smaller. More toned. I didn't come up with this on my own, it was drilled into me by a media landscape that is violently anti-fat (anti-anything that is not THIN af).

Anyway - EVERYONE!!! DO BETTER! Hold people, industries, organizations, etc etc accountable. ( )
  s_carr | Feb 25, 2024 |
well, yeah. ( )
  mslibrarynerd | Jan 13, 2024 |
yes. yes. yes. “This cultural obsession with weight loss doesn’t just impact our physical and mental health; it also impacts our sense of self and, consequently, our relationships with others of different sizes.” this book addresses fat phobia, harassment of fat people, intersections of fat phobia with racism and misogyny, systemic anti-fat bias as it affects everything from employment to good health care and much more. Aubrey Gordon talks about the real effects of anti-fat bias tend to exist on a sliding scale with the worst of it often being directed at the very fat. she mentions a lot of research. research that shows dieting to be statistically really bad in helping people to lose significant amounts of weight and keeping it off. research on how cycling through weight loss and gain actually harms your metabolism and makes it harder to lose or even maintain a weight. research showing that the abuse and bias faced by fat people makes them less likely to engage in healthy behaviors. research showing that despite the public discourse that fat people are supposedly unattractive, fat porn is one of the most searched types. Aubrey Gordon writes about the reality of living in a fat body, the harmful nature of fatphobia and what it would take for our culture to re-imagine our relationships to our bodies. everyone should read this and really sit with it. “We can build a world in which fat bodies are valued and supported just as much as thin ones.” ( )
  Ellen-Simon | Dec 21, 2023 |
As a life-long thin person with little chance of ever experiencing being a fat person, I was interested to learn more about anti-fatness and the experiences of fat people. I had a couple related books on my to-read list, but decided to start with this one when I realized it was written by Aubrey Gordon, host of a podcast I like about diet culture called Maintenance Phase.

The book was pretty bleak, aside from the last chapter. Some of the anecdotes were shocking but illuminating. As an aside, I sure hope Aubrey has better friends now!

I think this book would've benefited from editing by thin QTBIPOC as many of the issues in the book really apply to anyone (especially non-cis men) who doesn't have an 'ideal' appearance: white, straight, cis, thin (but not too thin), clear skin, 'good' hair, etc. When I was more underweight and had bad acne, for example, I'd also experience unsolicited advice from strangers about it. There are definitely issues explained in the book that are unique to fat bodies, though, which I was more interested in learning about.

Unfortunately the book does get quite repetitive, and I think some of the chapters could've been more focused. I recommend just reading the introduction chapter to chapter 3, and the last 2 chapters. The middle chapters drag on and chapter 6 in particular spent way too much describing tv and movie plots for my tastes. ( )
  matsuko | Aug 17, 2023 |
This is an excellent book that I hope is especially read by straight sized people so they can see the reality of living in a world that hates fat people. ( )
  thewestwing | Aug 12, 2022 |
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Biography & Autobiography. Sociology. Nonfiction. HTML:From the creator of Your Fat Friend and co-host of the Maintenance Phase podcast, an explosive indictment of the systemic and cultural bias facing plus-size people.
Anti-fatness is everywhere. In What We Don??t Talk About When We Talk About Fat, Aubrey Gordon unearths the cultural attitudes and social systems that have led to people being denied basic needs because they are fat and calls for social justice movements to be inclusive of plus-sized people??s experiences. Unlike the recent wave of memoirs and quasi self-help books that encourage readers to love and accept themselves, Gordon pushes the discussion further towards authentic fat activism, which includes ending legal weight discrimination, giving equal access to health care for large people, increased access to public spaces, and ending anti-fat violence. As she argues, ??I did not come to body positivity for self-esteem. I came to it for social justice.?
By sharing her experiences as well as those of others??from smaller fat to very fat people??she concludes that to be fat in our society is to be seen as an undeniable failure, unlovable, unforgivable, and morally condemnable. Fatness is an open invitation for others to express disgust, fear, and insidious concern. To be fat is to be denied humanity and empathy. Studies show that fat survivors of sexual assault are less likely to be believed and less likely than their thin counterparts to report various crimes; 27% of very fat women and 13% of very fat men attempt suicide; over 50% of doctors describe their fat patients as ??awkward, unattractive, ugly and noncompliant?; and in 48 states, it??s legal??even routine??to deny employment because of an applicant??s size.
Advancing fat justice and changing prejudicial structures and attitudes will require work from all people. What We Don??t Talk About When We Talk About Fat is a crucial tool to create a tectonic shift in the way we see, talk about, an

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