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What My Mother and I Don't Talk About: Fifteen Writers Break the Silence

di Michele Filgate (A cura di)

Altri autori: Andre Aciman (Collaboratore), Julianna Baggott (Collaboratore), Sari Botton (Collaboratore), Alexander Chee (Collaboratore), Melissa Febos (Collaboratore)9 altro, Cathi Hanauer (Collaboratore), Leslie Jamison (Collaboratore), Dylan Landis (Collaboratore), Kiese Laymon (Collaboratore), Carmen Maria Machado (Collaboratore), Bernice L McFadden (Collaboratore), Nayomi Munaweera (Collaboratore), Lynn Steger Strong (Collaboratore), Brandon Taylor (Collaboratore)

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2586104,459 (3.73)2
ONE OF NPR'S BEST BOOKS OF 2019 *Most Anticipated Reads of 2019 by Publishers Weekly, BuzzFeed, The Rumpus, Lit Hub, The Week, and Elle.com* Fifteen brilliant writers explore what we don't talk to our mothers about, and how it affects us, for better or for worse. As an undergraduate, Michele Filgate started writing an essay about being abused by her stepfather. It took her more than a decade to realize what she was actually trying to write: how this affected her relationship with her mother. When it was finally published, the essay went viral, shared on social media by Anne Lamott, Rebecca Solnit, and many others. The outpouring of responses gave Filgate an idea, and the resulting anthology offers a candid look at our relationships with our mothers. While some of the writers in this book are estranged from their mothers, others are extremely close. Leslie Jamison writes about trying to discover who her seemingly perfect mother was before ever becoming a mom. In Cathi Hanauer's hilarious piece, she finally gets a chance to have a conversation with her mother that isn't interrupted by her domineering (but lovable) father. André Aciman writes about what it was like to have a deaf mother. Melissa Febos uses mythology as a lens to look at her close-knit relationship with her psychotherapist mother. And Julianna Baggott talks about having a mom who tells her everything. As Filgate writes, "Our mothers are our first homes, and that's why we're always trying to return to them." There's relief in breaking the silence. Acknowledging what we couldn't say for so long is one way to heal our relationships with others and, perhaps most important, with ourselves. Contributors include Cathi Hanauer, Melissa Febos, Alexander Chee, Dylan Landis, Bernice L. McFadden, Julianna Baggott, Lynn Steger Strong, Kiese Laymon, Carmen Maria Machado, André Aciman, Sari Botton, Nayomi Munaweera, Brandon Taylor, and Leslie Jamison.… (altro)
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naturally, some of these hit harder than others. i felt a deep kinship with everyone writing about how they desperately wished to know their mother more- the depth of her life before becoming a mother, her dreams and aspirations, the other paths she chose not to wander down. reading this both soothed and exacerbated the ache inside of me. ( )
  bisexuality | Mar 3, 2024 |
This book started off as 5 stars all the way, but unfortunately I feel like the editor organized it from the best essay to the worst. However, despite that, I really liked that this book focused on a much under-scrutinized relationship. There are some renowned authors here, and I think they do a great job of conveying the tension between maternal love and the many mistakes that mothers make.

As a mother myself, I often wonder about the mistakes I have made and whether my children will forgive them. I wonder that because my own relationship with my mother was not smooth and has lead to a strained relationship even to this day. This book made me feel more forgiving and also made me hope I will be forgiven.

I would love to see an equivalent book "What My Child and I Don't Talk About" from the mothers' perspective.

( )
  Anita_Pomerantz | Mar 23, 2023 |
I will admit both the title and the concept of this book intrigued me. As a grown woman who still wonders about the relationship with her own mother and where exactly it went wrong, it was an interesting find. Unfortunately, not all but I was left with nothing more than petty, and sometimes annoying revelations. ( )
  Jennifer-Hettenbach | Feb 3, 2020 |
These stories of Mothers were beautifully written, dark, heartbreaking, and hopeful. ( )
  EllenH | Sep 13, 2019 |
I appreciated this book's honesty, but wasn't wowed by it. ( )
1 vota sp12295 | Sep 5, 2019 |
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Nome dell'autoreRuoloTipo di autoreOpera?Stato
Filgate, MicheleA cura diautore primariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Aciman, AndreCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Baggott, JuliannaCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Botton, SariCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Chee, AlexanderCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Febos, MelissaCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Hanauer, CathiCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Jamison, LeslieCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Landis, DylanCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Laymon, KieseCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Machado, Carmen MariaCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
McFadden, Bernice LCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Munaweera, NayomiCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Strong, Lynn StegerCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato
Taylor, BrandonCollaboratoreautore secondariotutte le edizioniconfermato

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Because it is a thousand pities never to say what one feels... -Virginia Woolf, Mrs. Dalloway
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For Mimo and Nana
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On the first cold day of November, when it was so frigid that I finally needed to accept the fact that it was time to take my winter coat out of the closet, I had a craving for something warm and savory. -Introduction, Michele Filgate
Lacuna: an unfilled space or interval, a gap. -What My Mother and I Don't Talk About, Michele Filgate
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ONE OF NPR'S BEST BOOKS OF 2019 *Most Anticipated Reads of 2019 by Publishers Weekly, BuzzFeed, The Rumpus, Lit Hub, The Week, and Elle.com* Fifteen brilliant writers explore what we don't talk to our mothers about, and how it affects us, for better or for worse. As an undergraduate, Michele Filgate started writing an essay about being abused by her stepfather. It took her more than a decade to realize what she was actually trying to write: how this affected her relationship with her mother. When it was finally published, the essay went viral, shared on social media by Anne Lamott, Rebecca Solnit, and many others. The outpouring of responses gave Filgate an idea, and the resulting anthology offers a candid look at our relationships with our mothers. While some of the writers in this book are estranged from their mothers, others are extremely close. Leslie Jamison writes about trying to discover who her seemingly perfect mother was before ever becoming a mom. In Cathi Hanauer's hilarious piece, she finally gets a chance to have a conversation with her mother that isn't interrupted by her domineering (but lovable) father. André Aciman writes about what it was like to have a deaf mother. Melissa Febos uses mythology as a lens to look at her close-knit relationship with her psychotherapist mother. And Julianna Baggott talks about having a mom who tells her everything. As Filgate writes, "Our mothers are our first homes, and that's why we're always trying to return to them." There's relief in breaking the silence. Acknowledging what we couldn't say for so long is one way to heal our relationships with others and, perhaps most important, with ourselves. Contributors include Cathi Hanauer, Melissa Febos, Alexander Chee, Dylan Landis, Bernice L. McFadden, Julianna Baggott, Lynn Steger Strong, Kiese Laymon, Carmen Maria Machado, André Aciman, Sari Botton, Nayomi Munaweera, Brandon Taylor, and Leslie Jamison.

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