This book changed the way we were all thinking about aging. A walk through the American history of aging, perspectives, and marketing to the end. Jacoby cuts through the romantic notions of aging, that it will eventually be cured, that we can be ourselves up to the very old end of a healthy dynamic life. Her writing style of mixing personal anecdotes with statistics, facts and straight-shooting reporting makes this a very readable tome on a very sobering topic; one we try to avoid. ( )

What a fantastic get-a-hold-of-yourselves-people book. Centered and rational, mature and eloquent, Jacoby gives the best honest assessment of aging that I have not seen anywhere else. "Anywhere else" being mass media, who continues to hawk old age as utopia, less free of infirmities than actual reality. Very impressive in this book as well is that any time research or findings are cited, she puts it in proper context by revealing what salient questions were not asked, what missing data implies, etc. An excellent read that never becomes treacly despite her mention of sad personal experiences. ( )

This book stands out as being both extremely disturbing and extremely important. It argues that aging is not, in fact, enjoyable. The societal myth that turning 65 will usher in the Golden Years if only you do things right only makes it more difficult economically, socially, emotionally, and physically, for both the old and their caretakers, when that inevitably turns out not to be the case.

My big take-aways from this book are the following: (1) No matter how physically and mentally spry you are, you will start watching more and more of the people you love die, more and more often, right up until you yourself die. I need to be emotionally prepared for that eventuality, and sensitive to it as a very real cause for depression in the old. (2) Dementia is a disease of old age -- and if you live long enough, it is very likely you will get it. Half of people over 85 have dementia. I should live as if I will become demented in time, and I should *expect* one or both of my parents to lose their minds as they age. (3) It is very hard and very rare to successfully exert control over your death, especially as your caretakers further infantilize you (whether warranted or not). I should make plans now, to avoid burdening my caretakers with what often amounts to an emotionally exhausting decision topped off with medical debt.

Scary, intimidating stuff. But important. And highly recommended for that reason. ( )

Susan Jacoby believes that aging Americans have been led to seriously underestimate the financial and health problems they may face as they age. An emphasis on the relatively healthy young/old encourages them to think that normal health and activity levels can be maintained into later life. The truth, according to Jacoby, is that nearly 50% will suffer some degree of dementia as they age and that many will outlive friends, spouses and siblings to face a life restricted by societal barriers such as lack of suitable housing and transport, health problems and finances.

Excellent corrective to the media/advertising blitz encouraging people to think they are going to live forever, or worse, live until 100 and feel like 30 up to that time. Those of us who are 50+ know from our own experiences that the sheer unpredictability of aging mitigates against the idea that ingesting anti-oxidants or other potions will ensure a smooth ride. Those of us with aging parents further understand the profound limitations of reaching 80 and beyond, notwithstanding the very few outliers who beat the odds. Problem is that we all think we will beat the odds. Jacoby is a long overdue wakeup call on that sort of fallacious thinking. ( )