Gr 9 Up—Determined to enjoy all her senior year has to offer, Effie embraces moving out of her comfort zone and
speaking up. A fantastic contemporary tale filled with authentic moments about the daily life of a wheelchair user
who is finding her voice while navigating an ableist world.
NB: Also received Schneider Family Book Award (honor).

As a part of my spot on a blog tour for this book I had the honour of interviewing Claire Forrest about Where You See Yourself! You can read the interview discussing Where You See Yourself and more over on my blog Just Geeking by.

Content warnings:
This book contains an ongoing theme of ableism and ignorance about disability from the start. This includes ableism at school from school administrators, educators, and the student accommodations coordinator, and at higher/further education in the form of college admissions staff.

Where You See Yourself by Claire Forrest has been on my TBR since the moment I heard about it. While there’s been an increase in books with disabled characters, especially in young adult books, there are still very few that are completely focused on disability. In Where You See Yourself the main focus is disability, ableism and self-advocacy, and it was a brilliant read that touched upon so many aspects of growing up as a disabled teenager with a chronic illness.

Forrest has written a beautiful book that covers so many things that I felt and experienced as a teenager, while also capturing the essence of what it’s like to be a teenager. I say that because being a disabled teenager is an experience that is both the same and different to that of a non-disabled teenager, and that’s something that Effie Galanos knows all too well. As she starts her senior year the divide between her and her non-disabled classmates feels like it’s becoming larger by the minute. From romance, to prom invites and of course, college applications, Effie is extremely aware of how different her life as a disabled student and wheelchair user is.

It starts on the first day of her senior year when her second locker, an accessibility accommodation that has been in place for years so that Effie doesn’t have to carry all her things around school, is suddenly removed by the school administration. When she inquires about it, she’s informed that it wasn’t on her record and Effie finds out that her student accommodations coordinator failed to add it to her file for the new year. Instead of fixing the mistake, the coordinator makes excuses and continues to be an obstacle for Effie for the rest of the year.

This isn’t anything new; Effie’s mom has been dealing with Ms. Wilson for years. With Effie about to head off to college, alone, her mom is eager for Effie to step up and start handling issues like the locker herself. But as Effie soon finds out self-advocacy isn’t as easy as it sounds. Things become even more complicated when seniors are allowed to leave campus for lunch and the school administration declares that they must use the main entrance on the second floor to check in and out. An entrance that is completely inaccessible to Effie, the only disabled student in the school. Despite complaining to the school and Ms. Wilson, Effie is left behind as the entire senior year head off campus for lunch.

Just when Effie feels like she’s making headway with the whole college thing (she’s even got her parents to agree to something huge!) she finds herself facing even more obstacles. The level of ableism she’s facing feels unstoppable, and she’s just one person. Can she overcome her own fears and rally herself to advocate for her accessibility needs to prove to everyone and herself that she’s ready for college?

Forrest has done a fantastic job of interweaving all the moving parts of a teenager’s life with Effie’s struggle for independence and self-advocacy in the face of ableism. She shows the obvious differences in Effie’s life as someone with cerebral palsy and a wheelchair user, but as someone who has lived these experiences she is able to include so many personal touches that many non-disabled readers will probably not be aware of. For example, Effie’s thoughts about her sister being able to wear whatever boots struck a particular cord for me. While I’m not a wheelchair user, one of my health conditions means that I can’t wear high heels. Experiences like this are something that Forrest highlights so well through Effie’s inner voice.

Effie’s a strong protagonist who is likeable and also very recognisable to me. She’s complicated, and Forrest doesn’t shy away from showing her as someone who make mistakes especially in her relationships. Relationships are at the very heart of this book, both in the positive and negative, from those who care for Effie, those who are ignorant of what she’s going through and those who treat her badly. Effie’s relationships with her family and her friends are healthy, yet rife with guilt and shame on her part, and she often feels like a burden when plans have to change to accommodate her due to her disability. There’s a level of jealous as well when her friends and sister can do things easier without thinking, and without planning every thing. These may make Effie seem like a horrible person, however, these are all thoughts that many disabled people have had, and it’s appreciated that Forrest doesn’t avoid including them.

I’ve read quite a few books now with a protagonist that has cerebral palsy and this is the only one that has gone into details about symptoms. Forrest has not hesitated in explaining exactly what is happening in her body when someone touches her shoulder or when the clonus (involuntary muscular contractions) happen. Clonus, in fact, is a term that I hadn’t ever heard before and had to look up. It was great to see Effie’s disability front and centre, not hidden away because it might offend someone.

One theme that continues throughout Where You See Yourself is ignorance of ableism, particularly casual ignorance. Effie’s classmates have no idea that she’s been prevented from going to lunch, and they’re shocked when they find out what she’s been going through. They’re not aware that their hugely elaborate prom invites every year actually cause Effie a whole world of problems while she’s trying to get around school. While Effie’s best friends are aware of what she has to deal with they’re not aware of everything she has to deal with, including how much more difficult it is for her to find a college where she can actually move around the campus.

A lot of their ignorance is to do with teenagers just being wrapped up in their own lives, and this is something that Forrest covers in Where You See Yourself. After all, there’s a lot of happening in teenagers lives and with the added pressure of college applications in senior year everyone’s stressed out. Tempers flare as Effie and her friends try to navigate everything life is flaring at throwing at them, and Effie struggles to keep up with her friends lives when her own is in such a turmoil.

My experiences as a university student are different to Effie’s, however, I’ve dealt with my fair share of ableism at university. One campus has a huge set of stairs which were inaccessible for me, and the only alternative route is to walk through multiple buildings instead. Therefore, I felt every single part of Effie’s despair at being told that a campus had a path that was inaccessible to her, and that requests for an accessible path to be added had been ignored for years.

Amongst all of Effie’s struggles, she still feels plenty of joy, love and laughter in Where You See Yourself, and that is a very important point to make. So many people think that being disabled is a fate worse than death and Forrest has written a novel that shows that while being disabled is tough, but it can still be a life full of love. It is made easier when we have people who love and support us, with education organisations and staff who actually support us in the way they should.

I can’t recommend Where You See Yourself by Claire Forrest enough. If you have a teenager in your life then they should read this.

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By the time Effie Galanos starts her senior year of high school, she’s been looking at colleges for what feels like forever; there’s a spreadsheet and everything. But she’s had to, because finding a college that’s not only the perfect fit, but also accessible enough for Effie to get around on her own in her wheelchair has created a lot more boxes to check off on her selection.

Effie hasn’t told anyone yet, but she already has her heart set on a school in New York City with a major in Mass Media & Society that would set her up on her dream dream. She’s never been to NYC, but she can picture herself on campus via the pictures she sees in the brochures. When she finds out her longtime crush, Wilder, is not only applying but getting accepted early admissions, she feels like it’s the best place.

But, everything isn’t always as simple as it seems, and the universe seems to have other plans. As Effie navigates through her senior year with college visits, senior class traditions, internal and external ableism, and a lot of firsts (and lasts), she learns that she needs to be open to the change being presented in front of her and that by doing so, dreams she never even knew were there could flourish.

The representation in this book is amazing and beautiful and I just loved it so much. Effie, who is a wheelchair user, is learning throughout this novel how to advocate for herself and which battles she wants to fight and what others she may have to either come back to, or leave alone. In the later part of the book, she sees other wheelchair users in relationships and she mentions how she’s always wondered how she would have ever do x,y, and z, but that the others that she sees are doing it and it gives her hope and reminds her to kind of reevaluate how she thinks of her capabilities.

The friendships in this story are so cute and adorable - even the romance between Effie and Wilder. It’s nothing super crazy, and not the main focus of the novel, but still cute nonetheless.

I will be highly encouraging quite a lot of people I know to read this book. It has great representation and deals with the scariness of being a senior in high school and trying to find out what and where you’ll be going the next year. I think a lot of people will feel seen while reading this book.

*Thank you Scholastic Press and Edelweiss+ for an advance digital copy of this book in exchange for an honest review ( )