At times it had seemed so irrational to me to endure this seven years of misery just to end it all the day it was up. Of course it was no more irrational than what Carol did. But she had her reasons and I had mine. The thought of that unhappy spirit wandering around wherever all that takes place had filled me every night of the past seven years with guilt and remorse. That was why I was doing it. mainly. While putting myself beyond the reach of the law, at least that's what they'd told us on Superman, I was also atoning in front of Carol for the way I'd treated her at the end. Every day I spoke to her about it. Every day I'd renewed my pledge to meet her. Every day she had the chance to see me suffer for what I'd done to her. At least now I felt I had purged myself of my guilt in her eyes.