Pretty much every relationship depicted was extremely unhealthy, including the main romance where they'd be "forgiving" each other one minute and then yelling at each other about the things they supposedly forgave each other for the next. I also didn't think the characters were very consistent or fully developed. But also, I don't normally like romance novels but I guess this is how straight people feel when they read them. So like, three stars cause gay? ( )

*I received an advanced E-Copy from NetGalley; all opinions are my own*

Melissa Lenhardt’s writing made me fall in love with the western genre with her Sawbones trilogy, so I was curious to see what she would do as she published her first contemporary women’s fiction. The Secret of You and Me is billed a modern take on Jane Austen’s Persuasion, and more intriguingly, is an LGBTQ romance.

Well, Lenhardt pulled no punches with this one by setting it in a conservative, judgmental, homophobic Texas town, which immediately set the bar for conflict pretty high. The story begins when Nora, who left Sophie, her family, and everything else behind at 18 when she is caught by Sophie’s mother, returns home for her estranged father’s funeral. Sophie, who stayed behind and married Nora’s boyfriend, has been living a lie for the past 18 years, and the pain of the lie resulted in alcoholism. Oh, and Sophie’s husband is gearing up to run for office.

This was a complex tale, and Lenhardt’s world-building and character development shine (although this is definitely a world I wouldn’t want to occupy). Both Sophie and Nora are complicated, flawed women. Nora has avoided getting to close to anyone since she was 18, and in the process is a bit selfish. Sophie has been in denial since she was 18, trying her best to live the life she has, which is far from the one she imagined.

This is a story of forgiveness and one of romance and second chances. There is betrayal and disappointment in the past, and as amends are made, more of the story behind the betrayal comes to light. Sophie seeks forgiveness from Nora, but I think she ultimately also forgives herself. They find themselves with a second chance at love, but given where Sophie is both personally and literally, I couldn’t see a way for the couple to have their happily-ever-after.

The story is dialogue heavy and at times, the conversation is exhausting. Nora and Sophie have a lot of baggage to work through, and there is a back and forth of anger and then forgiveness, and then another argument crops up, and then forgiveness follows. The town is steeped in homophobia, and you can easily imagine the weight of pressure and fear Sophie feels at the prospect of being outed. This is not, generally, a lighthearted love story. Many of the side characters were genuinely unlikeable, emphasizing the difficulty of their relationship there should they come out. The problems felt authentic, as did the stress both characters were under.

The quick dialogue back and forth between Sophie and Alima was a delight, even when it wasn’t quite nice. There are some touching moments between Sophie and her teenaged daughter too. The love between Sophie and Nora feels real, even if at times I wondered if they could come together after all the time they’ve been apart. Lenhardt manages their resulting steamier scenes in a manner that gives heat but isn’t graphic.
The story alternated between uncomfortable, frustrating, and hopeful, and the author found a resolution to Sophie’s dilemma that was both believable and inspired. I found myself invested in the characters even when I didn’t entirely like them – which is proof of good storytelling in my book.
I’m giving The Secret of You and Me four stars. ( )

The Secret of You and Me is the story of Nora Noakes and Sophie Russell. Nora, ex army, returns home to Texas from DC after her father dies. Coming home for his funeral is the first time she has returned to her home town since getting kicked out as a teenager. She has to navigate the many weird, uncomfortable and awkward relationships that she had left behind, and she wants to leave town as soon as possible. However, circumstances outside of her control trap her there. Sophie, her ex best friend, never left the town, and is now married to Charlie, Nora's ex boyfriend, and has a teenage daughter. It's impossible for them to avoid seeing each other again. Nora returning home rekindles old friendships and flames, but might they be better off left alone?

The book switches between Nora's point of view and Sophie's point of view. I liked the balance of getting both sides of the story. The tension between Nora and Sophie, with all of their shared history, is just so painfully good. And the Nora - Sophie - Charlie triangle is so complicated, full of secrets and lies. Throughout the whole book I was on the edge of my seat trying to figure out the truth. The tangled web of broken down relationships simply oozes regret and nostalgia. This book is about grudges, grief, reconciliation, love and loss, and is packed full of messy, complex emotions.

I found this book really easy to read. I was hooked by the secrets, and trying to figure out the truth. I loved the characters. The main characters are brilliant, complicated, flawed people, and there is also a whole cast of interesting side characters. Everything feels real. Real people with real lives. There's plenty of brilliant, catty, snarky dialogue, but also some really emotional, heartwrenching moments as well. The book deals well with mental illness. It touches on both PTSD and alcoholism, and I felt like both were portrayed well. Nora's stint in the army wasn't glorified, either. Prejudice and religion feature heavily as well. Nora and Sophie's story is very much defined by the oppressive place they grew up in, and the homophobia that they both experienced and internalised. This story is about overcoming the past, and moving on, or moving forward. Is it even possible to right old wrongs?

The Secret of Me and You is an intense book, and it really made me feel a whole raft of emotions. I loved it. It made me think a little bit of Dark Places and Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn, and Big Little Lies by Lianne Moriarty, although the drama is much more subtle. I highly recommend this book if you like slow burn romance, complex and messy relationships, and plenty of secrets and lies. ( )