Like a furious collective roar. Its power lies in how it's the story for so many women: the societal and cultural sexism supported by the wilful ignorance of those who benefit. The use of actual references were so effective in the way it removed the thin veneer of fiction from the stark reality. Like the reverse of a fictionalised documentary, this was a made-up story of one woman's life non-fictionalised for a collective experience. I'm haunted by Kim Jiyoung. Reading it consisted of me doing pained chuckles and feeling like the emoji with the tightly drawn lip smile and dead open eyes with one tear falling. ( )

Best for:
Anyone interested in a straightforward exploration of a woman’s life under patriarchy. In this case, the patriarchy women experience in Korea.

In a nutshell:
Kim Jiyoung’s story, from birth through motherhood, and all the times her being a girl / woman has been held against her.

Worth quoting:
“It felt more like harassment or violence than pranks, and there was nothing she could do about it.”

“It wasn’t that she didn’t have time - she didn’t have room in her head for other thoughts.”

“The world had changed a great deal, but the little rules, contracts and customs had not, which meant the world hadn’t actually changed at all.”

Why I chose it:
I’d heard about the 4B movement recently, and this book (and the film it was eventually made into) is referenced as influencing it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/4B_movement

Review:
On the surface this is a simple book. It’s a totally straightforward telling of one woman’s story, from birth through primary school, university, work and marriage.

From being a disappointment to her parents purely because she was a girl, to working to put her younger brother through university before she was able to go, to trying to find a job, to getting married and having a child. And all the ways that society puts the boys and men in her life first, both figuratively and, in the case of the order of who gets served lunch in primary school, literally.

But this is also a clever book - it takes a story that could be the story of so many women and makes it personal. It doesn’t have flowery writing, or long scenes of dialog. But it has emotion - and a lot of it. I had so many feelings while reading it. I often wrote in the margins such deep words as ‘gross’ and ‘what the fuck.’

Author Cho delivers an unexpected (to me, as I wasn’t familiar with the book or film at all) gut punch in the last few pages that still has me thinking a day after finishing the book. It’s an interesting framing that drives home all the pages that came before it.

What’s next for this book:
Recommending it to others. ( )

Kim Jiyoung is everywoman. Her name is a common one, her experience too. It would have been better if she'd been born a boy - according to her mother's in-laws. Her mother's career choices had been limited by the family's need to pay for her brother's education. Kim herself certainly plays second fiddle to her brother. The school system favours boys, university too. Boys sometimes harass girls - but it's the girl's fault. Women in work get paid less than men, and get overlooked for promotion. Kim discovers all this, and then gives up her career, which she loved, for a baby and domesticity. She can't be depressed - she has so much going for her surely? So she must be mad.

This story is told in an impersonal, baldly written style, and is supported by footnotes throughout. This is what gives the story its immediacy, and guaranteed its success among Korean women. Things might not be quite the same here, but this is a book whose message is not at all hard to understand. A vivid, uncompromising read. ( )

Unflinching and infuriating and superbly written! I got so angry and then heartbroken at times reading this and seeing how Jiyoung was treated and regarded, simply for being a woman. I think Cho does a wonderful job balancing out fact (the footnotes backing up her research were very informative) and fiction in a way that makes this story impossible to forget about. ( )

Although a novel, this story is punctuated with footnotes to facts and statistics about women’s second-class status in the workforce, an honest look at transitioning to full time motherhood and full economic dependency after having an interesting career, and a fascinating glimpse into the gender struggles in very traditional South Korea. I felt the characters were a little flat, but then when the narrator was revealed, it made more sense, and I suspect there may have been some nuances lost in translation. Nevertheless, a very good read. ( )