In 2016, Kate Carroll de Gutes won the Oregon Book Award, for Creative Nonfiction, and a 2016 Lambda Literary Award for memoir. I totally enjoyed that memoir Objects in Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear which is a collection of short essays, that link together as a whole. This book has the same structure; a group of short essays or prose pieces about a year of de Gutes' life; the year that her mother best friend and mother all died within 10 months.

I didn't think this book was as good, the essays can be uneven. But there are some real gems in here, honest and vulnerable. This one is from "Death is Like This"

"Death is like this: it's exhausting is what it is. It's sitting at your kitchen table at 6:30 am, because you can't sleep. Your middle sister, Sue, is propped up on one elbow, sprawled across your Ikea sleeper sofa, her makeup from the day before streaked across her cheeks, skin showing through in spots where her CPAP mask rubbed off the carefully layer foundation of vitamin C serum, BB cream, Bare Minerals and blush. Eyes clumpy with mascara as much from lack of sleep as from crying all the way to your house after you left your mother unconscious at the care facility.
Death is like this: two sisters drinking a pot of coffee at 6:30 in the morning, and one saying to the other, "Kate, we've got to get $15,000 out of mom's checking account before the Feds notify the bank that she's dead." ( )

This book is stunningly honest, emotionally rich, and humorous. Kate Carrol de Gutes faces difficult truths about her past, present, and future thoughtfully and compassionately. I found myself reading and rereading sections to figure out how she delves into her own memories and lived experience with such exactness and clarity. I recommend this book highly. Read it to understand what it is like to live through loss, finding healing in moments along the way. Read it to discover the writer's rich emotional landscape that may just broaden your own. Read it to feel less alone in the world. ( )

Worth reading. Contains important reflections and analysis around experiences of, anxiety, grief, depression, queerness/gender. ( )