Hilma Wolitzer's SILVER (1988) is a sequel to her IN THE FLESH (1977), taking us back inside the fluctuating fortunes of the marriage of Paulie and Howard Flax, twenty years later, closing in on their 25th anniversary (hence the title, SILVER). Upfront disclosure: I was already a Wolitzer fan, so predisposed to love this book. And I did, although it was hard sometimes to to bear witness to some of the heartaches and hard times the Flax marriage was experiencing. Separation, affairs, problems with adult children, and heart problems - physically and emotionally. I couldn't help but remember the column in the Ladies Home Journal of the 1950s and 60s, "Can this Marriage Be Saved?" But don't get me wrong, there's nothing corny or contrived about SILVER. The Flax's story, with all of its ups and downs, is just as real as it can be, as we get alternating chapters told by Paulie and Howard. Here's a sample, from Paulie, on women and friendship -

"Bless friendship, I thought, as we sat together in the kitchen, sipping iced tea. Sometimes I think we bully men with the mystique of closeness between women, another phenomenon besides childbearing we can torment them with. But the affinity is real, whether the women are teenagers in perpetual crisis, or forty-five year-olds like us, surprised to still be in the thick of things."

Indeed, all true of women and friendship, although I have never felt "tormented" by that special skill women have. In fact I have always admired and envied the way my own wife had always been able to quickly make friends in all the places we have lived in our fifty-plus years of marriage - and been glad for her.

Here's Howard, on his aged parents, who used to fight like cats and dogs -

"As they got older, they both mellowed; I suppose even she saw how all quarrels eventually end. They moved down to Miami, to a smaller apartment, like a couple of newlyweds. They bought everything in pairs: Barcaloungers, place mats, heating pads. When their ailments started piling up, they grew really considerate of each other, keeping careful track of who took what pill, and when, from that drug arsenal on their kitchen table."

Quarrels, downsizing, pairs buying, and oh yeah, that "drug arsenal" on the kitchen table. I can check all those squares here too (those fifty-plus years, remember?). So yeah, I could relate (and so will my wife, when she reads this).

And that childbearing phenomenon is in here too, as Paulie and Howard prepare joyfully, if a bit uneasily (some complications), to be grandparents. Been there too.

I know this book is 'old' now, first published over thirty years ago, but hell, I'm old too, so I had no trouble understanding what was going on here. It all seemed way too familiar, in fact. I loved this book - LOVED it. Thanks, Hilma. It's a brave book, all about marriage, warts and all. My very highest recommendation.

- Tim Bazzett, author of the memoir, BOOKLOVER ( )

I liked this book very much. It's a pretty realistic portrayal of life after 25 years of not-always-perfect marriage between Paulie and Howard. It focuses on how big events seem to be associated with major changes, and maybe that's reasonable. Those major life events tend to concentrate the mind and bring deeper emotions to the fore. But Wolitzer also draws out the more subtle influences and experiences of quotidian life. I particularly enjoyed the description of Paulie's new relationship and how that became a reality, and the relationship between Paulie & Howard and their adult children. ( )