Merry MITHRASMAS!!1!

Rape a virgin, kick a baby, skin a cat! 'Tis the season to be awful!

For starters, I'm redexing every thread containing the word "Christmas" in it. Loooooooor' love 'em! Spread some of that on our daily bread, why dontcha, you jolly roly poly caroling well-wishers!

Can I cook it instead? (shallots & rosemary) I suspect it evanescess off the bone at a breath. I hope you had a good one! (holiday)

'Twas fun, in a weird way! My perverse friends sat me down next to a Conservative ex-Cabinet minister. Not only that, but every time I reached for a dish he reached for my shoulder, arm, knee, thigh. Thankfully, wine flowed freely. But I wish I ate more.

Tell me about presents given and received in the Maison de Waugh...!

Merry Saturnalia! But why skin the cat? I can see the importance of raping virgins and kicking babies, but what have the cats done to deserve such treatment. and what about carpenters, Surely they need fixing?

Ummm, substitute carpenters, walruses and the like for cats where applicable!

I am very late to this game, but I do have to support 'Murr's concerns over the cat. Happy New year to all!

The cat was a Boojum!

I am sorry to say I cannot confess any tenderness or compassion for cats. They make me itchy and sneeze and I wish them all a safe trip in a sack downstream. Oh, sorry - did I type cats? I meant babies again. Any how, sorry for the delayed response. For Christmas, I received an asthmatic reaction from my sister's cats which kicked off a very nasty sinus infection, the upshot of which was asphixia and a sleighride to the ER at midnight. Later, over a a cape cod and a dose of prednysone (sp?), I revisited a of book of curse tablets. No calls yet from sister mentioning detonation of cats. I am not superstitious, but neither am I without hope.

I treated my mother to faulty tapas. Apparently SHE went home and detonated, though I fell, well fed, into my bed and a peaceful sleep. I was given many sweaters and a book on Persian art (merci mon amour, mon ame, il mio mondo!) - but no liquor, which is an oversight, a lack of character appreciation and a damned shame - because I'm out, and mentioned the fact often enough. But whining is worse than insensitivity, I suppose.

In any event and in most, if not all, seriousness, I hope all had a happy holiday season with friends and relatives and whatever noxious lifeforms you might keep around the house.

but no liquor which is an oversight

Santa always leaves a bottle of Jameson's in my stocking. You must have been worse than bad this year.

whatever noxious lifeforms you might keep around the house.

We are seeing an influx of a particularly nasty lifeform, encouraged by the warm weather, which some folks try to pass off euphemistically as Palmetto Bugs, but which in fact are LARGE AGGRESSIVE DISGUSTING COCKROACHES. It's become a nightly ritual to hear "Papa! There's a cockroach in the bathroom!", followed by a quick pitter-patter as my wife vacates the premises in horror and I advance, NYT sports section (the section I don't read) in hand to knock the little bastards senseless (the roaches, I mean) and send them, hopefully, to a swirling, watery grave.

Round about midnight, I can be found on the back patio with a glass in one hand and a brick in the other to drop on these abominations before they gain entry, but it's a futile effort.

Happy holiday to you too, ben.

I glad you mentioned that, my friend. The other morning I got up to start the coffee. I was rinsing the pot and tried to wash a crumb of cake down the sink. I was without my reading glasses, so got fairly spastic at my apparent failure to get a bead on the GD crumb. Rather than slip down the drain as directed, it kept trying to get up the side of the sink. In retrospect (having put on my glasses), I'm glad I didn't try to eat it.

Yeah, avoid the walking raisins.

Verily, all things are one, probably. APPARENTLY the Dutch have something called in English, "country boys" - raisins soaked in brandy. I have not tried this indelicacy, but suspect it kicks the stront out of chips soaked in mayonnaise.

On the one hand, no books or sweaters for me, on the other, somebody DID think to gift a nice bottle, plus a dirty movie. (Quiet days in Clichy, 1970)

Dem dam' palmetto bugs! One of the many things I don't miss about N'Awlins! Picture my face when I realised the things COULD FLY!

brrrrrrrrrrrr

On food in general my philosophy is this: I may eat anything that could conceivably eat me. Matter transforms, energy's conserved.

14
I could deal with the flying, if only they would fly away. But no, the vindictive little shits come straight at you!!

Salaam, Makif! I take it we were abbreviating you wrong before.

As usual, what was going on in my head was different from what others perceived, and being a thing of little import, I went along with it. (The preference was "Makif'at", but Czar Tim discourages such innovation.)

Still, I may have to change back. I was in a bookstore this morning, and attempted to access my catalog to see if I had a particular book, only to discover that I didn't know how to make the "." on my useless little phone. So I may change it back. Or learn how to use the phone. As Rimbaud said "Yes, our life is a misery, an endless misery! Why do we exist?"

I got no presents. no turkey. no stuffing. no champagne. and no love from Benwaugh. we don't do christmas in this hemisphere, thank god!

However, there was plenty of catnip and I did thrash my friends mercilessly at Scrabble.

happy new year to you all.

Makif.at, what's with the name change? and has anyone got any news on existanei? his profile has vanished again. did I miss something?

> 13

I can confirm the existence of "boerenjongens" (peasant boys), a "drink" eaten with a spoon, made of raisins, sugar, cinamon, vanilla, some water and lots of brandywine. There is also "boerenmeisjes" (peasant girls), where the raisins are replaced with apricots (it is a traditional way to preserve fruit). For if the cockroaches are really big.

As usual, what was going on in my head was different from what others perceived, and being a thing of little import, I went along with it.

Every time I see your name, it evokes (well, for me, anyway...) the remarkably vulgar comic Maakies

21
"a drunken Irish monkey"

Well, I can't really argue with that.

#20

I can see where brandywine could help get ANYTHING down.

#18

ME? MOI? MES NOUVELLES???

I wish I had any. I haven't been this boring in years.

#19

Murr, I cannot claim privileged info, but I believe Ex is ex-Ex for good.

Sorry for being so late to the party. I couldn't get online back then.

Hm. Mithrasmas?.. "Deck the hall with bowels of bovines..." Yes, I can see how that might be fun. Might try it next time around.

p.s.: > 22: So actually it's McIfat? - okay.

Deck the hall with bowels of bovines...

Uniquely atmospheric, and far better for the environment than tinsel.