Heather B. Armstrong (1975–2023)

I came to Heather's book having been a fan of her writing for over 15 years. With this experience, I fully expected to 100% connect to her words - especially about mental health. While I never suffered as long as she did (I have always been lucky that a medication change or the guidance of a new therapist could get me out of the darkness) the way she describes her suffering is so poignant and truthful it hit me in ways I couldn't have prepared myself for, even as someone who has been reading her for as long as I have.

But what made me sob openly was story after story of the unconditional love associated with Motherhood. FIRST: from her point of view. From the ways she tried to suffer silently to the eventual struggling through this new treatment to get better (on top of being a single Mom with a full-time job) for her girls. The way Heather writes about the desperation of Mothering her girls with unquantifiable love just spoke to my soul in ways I had never felt before.

But SECOND was the way she wrote about her own Mom and her journey watching her daughter's brain turn "off" for 15 minutes 10 separate times. The way her Mom describes Heather's courage, the way she witnesses Heather's journey, the way she answers Heather's calls and hold her hand...it's just something you have to read for yourself.

This book is definitely about depression and I encourage anyone who has struggled to understand a loved one who suffers from depression to read this book. Heather is such a gifted writer that you can FEEL her despair as she describes it. And then when life comes back to her again, you will feel it through her words in very visceral ways.

But to me - it also very much about Motherhood. It made me understand myself as a Mother so much more and it made me grateful for the opportunity to love my children the way Heather loves her girls and the way Heather is loved by her Mother.… (altro)

Wow...just...wow.

This wasn't an easy book to listen to, especially with the author narrating it. Her pain, her desperation comes through loud and clear. I can't tell you how often her words choked me up, made me tear up, or simply destroyed me.

I've gone through depression and anxiety, but nothing close to the level Armstrong details here. I do, however, know people who have been as low as this, as suicidal as this. Some made it through, some didn't. Armstrong's story, her unrelenting travelogue through the darkness opened up vistas of understanding for me that I'd never considered before.

The treatment aspect of the story is important, because of the result, but it's the insights along the way that are incredibly important for anyone who wants to try and understand what a person suffering from suicidal thoughts and depression are going through.

Just...wow. Thank you for this book, Heather. I'm glad I read it.… (altro)

I have known of Heather Armstrong as a blogger but have never read one of her books until now. I thought The Valedictorian of Being Dead was an incredible story and I am so happy that she shared it because mental health treatment is just as important as physical health. I had never heard of this treatment before and I think it is wonderful that she is helping normalize this by sharing.

I had a harder time with the memoir aspect of this book because of the details that she chooses to share about her family members. I did admire that she was able to share so opening what it truly felt like to experience depression that was deeply debilitating on many levels and I was happy to hear her parents were so supportive of her during this time as well.

Thank you to NetGalley and Gallery Books for providing me with a copy of this book. All opinions are my own.… (altro)