Colbert is to politics as the FameFatale is to celebrity life--both deliciously irresistible. If Hollywood is a sport, you want Leslie Gornstein on your team and this playbook in your ridiculously oversized leather purse. The Celebrity Playbook is the perfect introduction for newcomers to the exciting alternate reality of the celebrity lifestyle. A must-read for anyone who cares why so many celebs are sporting "bumps," or whether they are really "just like us," this guide--nay, rulebook--lays down the law on what you need to know to play Hollywood in a simple and concise manner. (And if you don't care? You care. It's a celebrity culture; if you can't embrace it, mock it!) The voice is intelligently hilarious, and everyone's favorite Answer Bitch has been around the boulevard once or twice. For the first time on the written page, she reveals the secrets to celebrity life. Here's everything you need to know to hire and fire assistants, develop a loyal entourage, get free makeup, and keep those inaccurate cellulite-inclusive photographs out of the press. With timeless anecdotes, razor-sharp quotes, and illustrative charts, The Celebrity Playbook is the smart girl's response to People.