Atheists, heathens, believers in Asgard, and others may find this book funny. Biblical literalists will not. Fair warning.

I remember sitting in Catholic school, seventh grade or so, and learning about free will. The whole concept puzzled me. I remember asking "Doesn't God know our fate before we were even born?"
"Ah, but you have free will and can change behavior and go to heaven."
"So I can surprise God?"
"No, God knows everything."
"So God knows my free will choices before I make them?"

I never got a good answer. I originally thought of it as something un-understandable, like imagining the edge of the universe, where it is and what is beyond it. That kept me awake at night thinking more than free will. As I got older I started noticing things that did not make sense and really couldn't continue on that path.

Wenke has seen the same dilemmas and instead of quietly walking away he plays his role as a self-described "Social Arsonist" and goes on the offensive with humor and sometimes sarcasm to make his point.

He uses the Bible and makes his case. In more cases than not God seems to be a fan of Rube Goldberg machines. Instead of using godly power to change things, he goes about it in a very roundabout method. God could have just had the Israelites walk out of Egypt instead of the plagues and parting of the Red Sea. He must have know that the theatrics would not have helped consolidate his chosen people. He had to know about the Golden Calf and the unfaithfulness his people demonstrated...repeatedly. God seemed to be present on a regular basis back then. He talked to Moses almost daily, now he just talks to Michelle Bachmann and that's not doing her much good.

Other small issues are brought up like what happened to Joseph? Jesus's foster father is barely mentioned and not mentioned at all after "finding Jesus at the Temple." He is not mention at the wedding feast or any other time Jesus is with his mother. Mark never mentions him and John only mentions him in passing. What about heaven? It never existed as a place for people until Jesus's time. Previously people went to Sheol, a dull grey place where all the dead went to whether they lived good or bad lives.

Most people know that the God of the Old Testament seems kinder and gentler in the New Testament. Satan also changed too. He was sly, clever, and hung out with God in Old Testament like in the story of Job. In the New Testament, Satan is pretty stupid. He tries to tempt Jesus with the Earth. I mean, Jesus' father made the earth, who's earth is it really, Satan?

Wenke is a bit hard on the Holy Spirit, almost making it seem like the Aquaman of the Trinity. But, he does hold a soft spot for Jesus:

Thank you, Jesus, for hanging out with shady people. Shady people are the best company.
...
Thank you, Jesus, for advocating the Golden Rule,
Thank you, Jesus, for saying, "Blessed are the peacemakers
...
Thank you, Jesus, for expecting nothing in return.

Jesus cried at the death of Lazarus, a very human experience especially since he raised him from the dead shortly after that.

To be fair, Wenke is not balanced in his writing, but that is to be expected. You would not expect a Christian to give a glowing review to Islam or Hinduism. This is a book that delivers what is expected and does so with humor and sarcasm. Wenke does not give an emotional argument but looks at what is written and comments on it from an outsider's view. It is not for everyone, but it does hit its target audience dead on.

( )

Lets start right off saying, if you are easily offended, don't bother picking up this book. If, on the other hand, you are capable of reading some very smart, very insightful religious satire, by all means get this book now!

Joe Wenke takes a critical, provocative look at The Bible and he does so with regular hilarity. He probes the questions many are afraid to ask out loud. Like for instance, "If God hardened Pharaoh's heart, doesn't that make the plagues all God's fault?" And why, during the great flood, did God feel it necessary to not only kill all the evil people, but all the animals? What did they do that was so horrible? And what about the fish? Flooding seems to be overly kind to them.

A relatively short read, I finished it in an afternoon, chuckling the whole time. ( )

In You Got To Be Kidding!, author Joe Wenke takes a sometimes funny sometimes angry look at the Bible. He clearly knows the book well and makes some provocative points about taking a literal view of many of the stories. I have no doubt many Christians will accuse him of cherry-picking, a right they seem to feel is only to be used by them. However, in fact, he looks more at the stories themselves rather than some of the controversies that have lately filled the news. He never, for example, discusses Biblical references (or, in some cases, lack of references) to homosexuality, birth control, or abortion but rather discusses the stories of Moses, Job, the prophets, Jesus, and more. His comments about Revelation had me laughing out loud.

For the most part, I enjoyed this book. There were times it felt like it was written by an angry adolescent which may have been intentional since I suspect many people who have read the Bible in their youth have come away with a WTF feeling. Still, his irreverence and humour keep the book from becoming just another angry attack on religion.

My guess is this book will not sway anyone on either side of the argument - religious or atheist. Having been raised a Lutheran as a child, I was taught that the Bible was not meant to be taken literally but as a group of stories to help us understand God. As an atheist, I see the Bible as a very old book which gives us insight into ancient culture. As I have never been a Christian fundamentalist, I have no idea what makes them tick. I do find it amazing that people in the 21st century would claim to follow the teachings of people from 2000 years ago. And, if they're going to, at least have the decency to show the same strength of their convictions as, say, the Mennonites and quit cherry-picking modern civilization. Regardless, they're not likely to read this book and, if they do, will probably declare Wenke the spawn of Satan who God will no doubt smite eventually or at least send the Westboro church to picket him unmercifully. But, enough with the sidebar - as I said I doubt this book will change minds but it might give a few chuckles and in this year of 'legitimate rape' and wacky Christian alternate history, who couldn't use a laugh? ( )

In You Got To Be Kidding! - The Cultural Arsonist’s Literal Reading of the Bible, Joe Wenke intentionally sets fire to the bridge between biblical stories and personalities and our contemporary understanding. Twisted with humor, straight language and a little sarcasm, this personal theology is both provoking and entertaining.
Humorous questions like Why did God turn Lot’s wife into a pillar of salt? Were there no other seasonings available? or Who reported the desert encounter between Jesus and Satan or Jesus’ prayer in Gethsemane when his disciples were all asleep? won’t rock the boat. You have to accept wordings like: “So Moses saves the people from total destruction at the hands of God, and what thanks does he get in return? A rebellion. Two hundred fifty chiefs led by a guy named Korah confront Moses and Aaron and basically say what’s so special about you? Hey, who made you the holy one?
Now I’m sure Moses was laughing to himself at this affront, thinking, “That would be God, asshole.” Wenke touches upon the cruelties in much of the Old Testament stories, from the penalty on the first trespassing in the Garden of Eden throughout God’s war crimes and the Sheol as a mass grave somewhere below the surface of the earth. Ecclesiastes is a no-read if you don’t want to get depressed. And the prophecies, they’re all so vague, that any interpretation may be right.
Jesus is cool, because he does even greater magic tricks than Old Testament heroes like Moses, Elijah and Elisha. He’s cool too, because he upsets the status quo, hangs out with poor and needy, shows mercy and emotion. The disciples are loosers, many journalistic sins committed by the authors of the gospels and Paul…. Paul’s the guy who institutionalized christianity, labeled sex icky and demoted women.
Wenke decodes the parables, powerful serving the core messages to his readers. There are many unanswered questions. And “Revelation is a trip. If you want to understand it, I suggest you first read the collected works of Edward Lear and Lewis Carroll and play a lot of Beatles songs backwards. I don’t want to get all caught up in my underwear right here when I’m ready to wrap up, so I’ll just cut to the chase and check out who’s in the house at John’s Apocalypse Lounge.”
If you made it to the end of this book and still believe (don’t you worry, I still do, because I don’t share this a-cultural, often out of context reading and stripped-from-humbleness interpretation of the Bible): congratulations! ( )

An excellent book! This is a very literal take on the bible and it's stories which is both funny and thought-provoking. Probably a bit uncomfortable for those of a religious persuasion. Why is it that 'thou shalt not kill' applies only to us and not God - he's killed millions. And those wise men were not so clever after all. I could not put this book down. It shows just how ridiculous some of the interpretations of the bible are and how God just does not make sense. I would really like to hear more from this author. ( )